TAKEAWAY DOODLES

People are requesting doodles on their takeaway boxes, with surprising results. I'd be scared that the surly recipient of my order would decide to smear his or her own bodily excretions on my food rather than getting arty.

I've seen some oversize animals before but some of these are total nightmare fuel. A cricket that's big enough to chomp a whole carrot? A crab the size of a dustbin? Oh god. I think I just pooped a little.

If god truly existed then he would definitely be getting Hollywood to make epic movie blockbusters like these with Mr. Tiger Blood himself starring in the lead role, in fact ALL movies & TV shows would feature him!

If you live in the first world you're probably toiling under a constant barrage of earth shattering problems that only other people who live in the first world can empathise with, like these. Here's to you, you poor unfortunate souls.

It's not always a sure thing that when you point a camera in someone's direction that they will oblige with a pose and a smile. But when it comes to cuties the chances of success go through the roof, smile or not!

Sometimes temptation can become too much for some people. If your current girlfriend is slim, active and only eats one salad leaf a day - respect her - it takes a lot of will-power to avoid the lure of burgers & fries as these relapses reveal.

Getting a tattoo might sound like a cool thing to do, but for god's sake, think about it carefully, make sure you realise that it's for life. And under NO circumstances will Edward from Twilight ever be a good choice for a dude. FAIL!

The dimples of Venus (also known as back dimples) are sagittally symmetrical indentations sometimes visible on the human lower back, just superior to the gluteal cleft. Ok, lesson over for today, now sit back and enjoy.

It's that wonderful, peaceful calm before the oncoming storm of an almighty hangover. You've had another heavy night and you could fall fast asleep on a bed of rusty nails. Or anywhere.

It's that time again. Monday morning. Time for another of our patent pended diabolically delectable dumps. If you don't get at least 75% of your daily allowance of lolz from this we offer a full moneyback guarantee!

This gallery is a tribute to the high-beams! Hottie celebs showing off their glorious headlights!