Ben Crane - On Working Out

If you ever wondered if there was any special, secret kind of workout regime that professional golfers used to become so awesome, you'd be right. It takes years of training and zen-like dedication to perform this kinda stuff - NOT!!!

What came first, the shitty rave music or the drugs? The chicken dance or the egg? Who cares, both are awesome. So, ring up Mental Dave and get some Little Men, 20 mitsubishis, jump in the motor & gurn this weekend away.

You might think it's Sub-Zero's spine ripping one, Jax's arm removal or Reptile's head devouring. You'd be wrong. There is one move that is far, far more brutal than all of these. Check it out.

'Male Cheerleader', that just isn't right however you try and say it - Well, even if this guy could pull of this stunt he still would fail for being a male cheerleader. Did he hurt his poor head - LOL!

Foreign swearwords might be fun and cool, but they're a blight on the Great British landscape. We've got plenty of awesome swearwords of our own and they're way more spiffing than those American ones.

Have you heard about that new movie coming out with Natalie Portman, where she’s a ballet dancer who loses her mind? Yeah, me neither. But there is one and it’s got a Portman/Mila Kunis cud-munching scene.

A great white circles a 21ft boat for 20 minutes and even gave the boat a slap with it's tail. With only 3ft difference in length, if that doesn't get you running to manna, nothing will. I get scaredy-farts just watching this.

This is definitely not the kind of singing I expected her to be doing. Still, if you're into death metal I'm sure it's extremely good. Not sure the judges really know what to think about it though...

First off you need to warm her up with a massage, which will get her in the mood. Then coax her into the whole idea, then all she needs to do is blow on it! Simples yes!

If you're learning English as a second language, it can't be much fun. If the illogical spellings weren't bad enough there's expressions like this. FYI it doesn't really mean that Jennifer likes to poop parties. Though she might?

So lets see if I got this straight. The US showed up but were late, England is left to fight Germany, and the French surrendered. Is this the World Cup or are we doing World War II again?